What's in a Name?

The name of this blog was "Sharing the Knowledge". This is that name's obituary...

We do not teach;
We share the knowledge.
-- RHH

These are the words that shaped my teaching style as an instructor, and I even called the site I made for my students "Share the Knowledge". In that context, I felt the name was appropriate and that what was there was accepted as knowledge.

But, for this blog, it just felt too ...stodgy... if that's the right word. What is knowledge for me may not be for you, and it sure got to feeling like a slammed door more than anything else. That slammed door kept you and I farther apart than I wanted. Besides, it was downright conceited!

As obvious as it was to me that the old name had to go, it took quite a bit of mulling to come up with a name that truly captured the who-what-where-when-how of writing for a presumably public audience. I figure that if you are witness to my life lessons, then they are real, which is why I created this blog. What I learn is then written in stone, so to speak, and openly worn on my shirt sleeve. That will keep me honest! Oh, I came up with some doozies for names: GistJoist, SpringStream, KindSense and Odd Street, to list just a few. These weird (brain farts) names are cool in their own way, but just not quite the "it" I was looking for.

This morning, before taking more than a few sips out of my first cup of coffee of the day, it hit me. Bumpy Path! Oh yes, this is it. This is the one. What a relief! It sure does seem to fit a lot better. What I hope is that you can read this blog and maybe save yourself from going over some of the same bumps that I did. Nothing more, nothing less.

What's in a name? All of it. Out with the old, in with the new...

What do you think?

Be the Journey

"There are about three moments in every second."

I remember reading that somewhere and thinking that it couldn't be possible since a second is such a very small chunk of time. There's no doubt that my initial reaction missed the point entirely. Perhaps this is an abstract, not a logical concept; and one of the reasons it is so difficult to grasp is that we are so programmed to be linear thinkers. Perhaps we no longer perceive the power of thought because we are unable to grasp the moments we are not thinking. It's like appreciating the good times because you've experienced the not so good times. But, it's another piece of the puzzle of balance and it's important to grasp the concept of "in the moment".

You will find a mountain of information about "in the moment". Being in the moment, living in the moment, lost in the moment… Google the term "in the moment" and you will get more hits than you'd ever be able to sift through in a lifetime, from Oprah and Dr. Phil to meditation and Zen. You'll find "in the moment" in relaxation techniques, counseling skills, becoming peaceful, becoming centered and empathically listening, to name just a few.

In this moment, in this instant, your past is behind you and set in stone. In front of you is your future, filled with possibilities and potential, and very much unknown. You could spend this moment wishing you could take back hurtful words, undo what can't be undone, take advantage of a missed opportunity, actually say something to your high school crush, etc. You could spend this moment worrying about what will happen or won't happen, bills to be paid, things to be done, places to go, people to see, etc.

Or, you could grasp the moment and experience the here and now. Instead of looking back on a faint memory of what you missed, you can stop bemoaning the past and worrying about the future. You can experience and live the beauty, the awareness, the peace, the goodness, and the wonder of nature. You find that you are content, energized and excited. You experience joy. Oh yes, it's risky. You have to let go and reach out and explore.

The good news is that you've probably already experienced living in the moment! Have you ever been driving down the road and suddenly snapped to and realized you had no idea how you got there? In that moment you snapped to awareness, startled into the moment, you had no choice but to look around and be right where you were to figure out just where, exactly, that was. It's like being yanked out of your life and set back in it again and it takes everything you've got to get your bearings.

There are other ways that you can hook onto this thing of living in the moment. Once you identify the moments, it becomes easier and easier to enjoy more and more. Here's a few that grab me every time:

Watch a child at play. Totally in the moment, the child will go down and climb up the slide over and over until something else catches the attention, and then it's the swing or the monkey bars or the sand box. This continues until Mother Nature calls with hunger or thirst pains. The child is just as happy to be in the moment with you or other children of any age too.

Watch animals. Though the animal knows when it's time to eat and where the food dish is, and has a pretty good idea that you'll be leaving based on what shoes you have on, the rest of the time, its doing exactly what nature intended: being in the moment. A cat will stalk a bird with great patience until the bird flies away or something else catches its eye. A dog will plop down and go into an immediate deep sleep then jump to full awareness if he hears a car door slam. A horse will fall asleep standing up with both eyes open and both ears going like radar, and deeply sigh with contentment as he is being brushed.

Listen to music. I mean really good music. The kind of music that you crank up way loud and gives you no choice but to sing and dance along. This kind of music gives you the feeling that it will never end, you hope it never ends, and when it does end, it leaves you peaceful and full.

Get outside. Enjoy nature. All of it. Watch a sunrise and a sunset. Go out in the middle of the night and look up at the stars. Sit in the grass and feel the sun, the breeze, smell the scents on the air, feel the blades of grass. Watch the grass grow.

Be creative. Lose yourself doing. Work in your garden, do a watercolor painting, build a birdhouse or a house, rearrange your living room, wash and wax the car… Just do.

Ah, now this is living!

(The other day, at the same time that the sun was setting behind me, in front of me was this incredible moonrise. Once I pried my chin off my chest, I snapped this photo with my cell phone. Surprisingly, it caught the colors true. It was one of those moments for me.)

Balance II

No use crying over spilled milk!

How many times have you heard that one? Actually, the question should be, "how many times have you spilled milk?" Perhaps you felt a twinge of guilt and glanced sheepishly around to see if anyone saw. It may have taken a bit to go from feeling to thinking to grab a paper towel or two to wipe up the spill.

Let me paint a picture here so that we can eavesdrop on "self talk" to trace that process a little more.

Imagine a woman who just spent hours doing what women do to get ready for a fancy, important party, and she looks good. She decides that, since she has a few minutes to spare, she can quickly whip up a special frosting for the cake she baked to bring instead of using the stuff in a can. She starts rummaging through her cupboards and soon discovers that there is no can of frosting, but all the dry ingredients for her special frosting is there. All that's needed is a half cup of milk. She opens the refrigerator door and sees that there is less than a half inch of milk left in the plastic gallon milk jug, just enough. She grabs it, flings around in haste, the milk jug snags the closing refrigerator door and falls to the floor. The top pops off, the jug bounces up in a somersault, and what's left of the milk goes everywhere, including on shoes, dress, hair....

Oh no oh no oh NO! She is frozen in place, eyes wide in disbelief and one hand over her mouth. The seconds tick, tick and then yes, a tear wells up.

Shit! This is not happening! She draws in a deep breath, her eyes narrow and her hands are clenched fists against her thighs. She stomps a foot once, then again and again.

My cake! My dress, my shoes, my hair! The foot that was stomping now serves a good kick to the offending refrigerator door. The pain is immediate, and this time, what's in her mind is said out loud:

"Dammit!" She hops on one foot over to a kitchen chair to melt into it, elbos on knees, head in hands.

*****

Thirty minutes later, ten fashionably late minutes past on time, we see our girl arrive at the party looking good (though slightly limping) and toting a fully frosted cake.

Feeling to thinking. How did she do it?

Out of the Blue

I don't pay attention to 'entertainment' news. What for? But today, Time's RSS feed includes this headline: Germany's Battle Against Scientology. Imagine my surprise! My last post was purely personal and I just happened to stumble on information that prompted that 'fantastic flight of fancy'. This article says:

(The judge ruled, among other things, that the group brainwashes members.) Says Sweden, "For the first time we had a judge, and not just rumors, stating that the group was dangerous." (Since 1995, the Church of Scientology has not enjoyed the legal protections accorded to religions in Germany, after a judge ruled that it was not a religion but a group "masquerading as a religion in order to make a profit.")

Perhaps I should look into filing suit against the Church of Scientology after all.

Fantastic Flight

It seems I spend a ridiculous amount of time playing Bejeweled. If there's a trick to that game, I'll be danged if I can find it. I don't even know if it's possible to win the game. And, it's also pretty mindless. While playing it, my mind just flows. Sometimes these flows are productive and creative. Sometimes they are just flights of fancy. Sometimes I can catch the productive, creative flow before I start playing that game, do some research and solidify my idea. Sometimes, the research itself sets off a flight of fancy.

The latter is a good description of my flight today. I had a good thought ruminating that I wanted to develop; something light and positive. So, I fired up Wikipedia and typed in the term I use to describe the concept, and came up blank. I tried one of the related, suggested terms, and stumbled onto an entry I was interested in that was also a source of a quote I knew of and hoped to find in the entry so I could document it. No, it wasn't a quote related to the idea I set out to research today. But, in this entry, there are references to a few things in Tibetan Buddhism and the Ancient Wisdom, so I followed those links to those entries.

Long story short, what I landed on in the end was a very long entry on L. Ron Hubbard. It is bizarre to find a link from Buddhism to Hubbard, who claimed to be the current incarnation of the Maitreya! I read through the Wikipedia entry and found no reference to that claim, a relief. Interest didn't wane though: My father was in the process of reading his book, "Dianetics", when he suddenly died of atherosclerosis, something that if diagnosed a by-pass would have cured. Reading through the entry was no less fantastic than reading that Mr. Hubbard thought he looked like the Maitreya so therefore must be his incarnation. (Do you see a resemblance?) I came away thinking that the man must've never slept in order to fail so miserably at so many things while succeeding at just as many others. It appears that his self-help theory of purging painful memories that he called "Dianetics" was lucrative enough for him to invest more time and energy than was his usual, so he built a business around it. It failed eventually as well, and he lost the copyright on the term "Dianetics" when his corporation declared bankruptcy. He then came up with Scientology because he felt the fastest way to become really rich was to invent a religion! His "Dianetics" book is now referred to as "Book One", and putting a volcano on the cover was his idea that the imagery would induce purchase in an inevitable, irresistible way, bringing more people and their money into his Church of Scientology. To me and my racing mind, this stuff is so "out there" that I began to think that if my father was buying into his theory, then he might have believed in the theory's claim that purging memories led to physical healing and didn't go to the doctor when he was feeling poorly.

"Whoa," I yelled to myself. My father wasn't gullible, only read half the book, nor would it be possible to prove even if he did delay seeking medical attention. "Hmm," I thought, "what an interesting way to meet Tom Cruise" if I went ahead and sued Scientology for my father's untimely death. What a hoot! I once went to a Star Trek convention and met the actor that played Chekhov in the original series. Even with my whopping 5'3 stature, I looked down to meet his eyes. For the life of me, I find it difficult to relate shortness with stardom. What if ol' Tom is that short too?

So then I think to myself, "If you can't say something good, then don't say anything at all." Oops. OK, then, "If you can't find something good to say, maybe there's something good to say about some part of it." I've got it! Here it is: I'll never know if Tom Cruise is short or not! Whew, I feel better now.

Now, back to my game...

(My father died November 11, 1989. I love him and miss him - still. He'd get a chuckle out of reading this.)

Baseline

A friend of mine talked me into going to see Stephen King's The Mist the other day. It was fitting because, while the plains states were suffering through a few days of ice storms, here in Arkansas there was this thick, dense fog that never lifted, even during the day. Very eerie and bizarre to me.

When I want something to read purely for enjoyment, I will most likely choose a Stephen King book. I own them all, and have read most of them several times, and there are a few I'll read about once a year. I enjoy the way he brings his characters to life by giving you what the character is thinking. In a way, you could say you know a Stephen King imaginary character better than you know any real person because you are witness to their thought processes. The plots stretch the mettle of the characters, and their thinking. Most of the time, I am disappointed by movies of Stephen King novels since the visual lends itself far more to the story than characterizations. But, I was not disappointed by The Mist. Not at all.

There are several premises in this movie that go along with what I've been talking about here. In one chunk of entertainment, you are given quite a bit to evaluate of yourself - without the crisis to test just how well you really know yourself.

Fear of the unknown. This is within us all to one degree or another, and not unusual by any means. But, what if what is unknown is within yourself as much as it is in the mist?

Paranoia. This tends to crop up more in those who focus all their energies on their idealized self rather than their real self. Their self-demands are often unrealistic and unattainable, and the thoughts behind them go something like, "I should be the most intelligent", "I should succeed" and "I should be even better because of the color of my skin." Anything, no matter how innocent or minor, can register as a threat, insult or degradation to that person.

Out of touch with reality vs broken reality. Any person involved in a combat situation, a natural disaster, or the victim of a rape or mugging will know this struggle first hand. How you stack up to yourself here goes hand in hand with....

Sheep or shepherd. Fear is a powerful thing. It can keep you alive. But, you are lost if you let fear rule. It eliminates reason, and lays you open to become the sheep of a charismatic maniac or, if you're lucky, you are led to safety by a true leader. This also goes hand in hand with...

Religion vs faith. Those charismatic maniacs are fundamentalist zealots with an idealized self more incredible, more fantastic, more unrealistic than any of Stephen King's "monsters".

Rock and a hard space. I talked about this in my Balance post. There are various levels of these kinds of decisions throughout the movie, and if you put yourself in the characters' shoes, would you choose the same way?

There is more, much more, in Stephen King's The Mist. This is a good place to start. Once you see the movie, come back here and share your thoughts.