Irksome Aging

Obeying all the rules, I'll drive through town at the speed limit, seatbelt on, use my turn signals and all the other things you're supposed to do, including paying attention. Ain't it inevitable that at least one driver will decide to turn into a side street right in front of me. Slam on the brakes, bury the nose of the truck into the ground, watch my camera and notepad slide off the passenger seat and onto the floor along with my travel cup that was in the cup holder, hoping that the lid will choose to stay on. More than a few choice words go along with the rearrangement of the inside of my truck that is now soggy. Age has not tempered my tongue a bit.

How about the ones going about 30 mph down the ramp to merge into traffic going at least 70 mph on the freeway? There are times when I wonder how much longer I can go without having to buy Depends just to drive down to the city! First chance I get, I'll zoom on by thinking I won't beep or flash a finger since that would only give some old fart a heart attack, and I'm well past and far ahead by the time it registers in my mind that it was some young fart that I could've stuck my tongue out at anyway.

I once said that the worst irksome thing was "the public expulsion of gastrointestinal bubbles." I try not to mention that often nowadays, especially since I'm as guilty as the next person of said malady when walking through the aisles at Wal-Mart. It's worse if someone pulled out in front of me on the way there too. There are just some graceless things that come along with the aging process. A-hem.

I met an interesting character today. A fellow newspaper man, much older than me, and twice as 'out there' without a doubt. I call him a 'character' because that's all I could think while listening to him talk about having 6 different papers that all go to press on Thursdays and how he has three guitars over in his van right now do I want to see and how he used to play with some band that I was supposed to know the name of. My way of thinking is that you just don't walk up to any man's van. Uh, no, not today. I have a headache. At least that part of things haven't changed much. It's just particularly gross at my age.

I won't mention the memory thing that goes along with all this. I also won't mention that the reason I won't mention it is because I can't remember what I was going to say about this memory thing. Can't help you there. I can forget what I was going to say right in the middle of a sentence nowadays. It makes for interesting conversations. That saved the character I met today from my usual "oh, that's bull" response that he would've gotten a few years ago. I forgot to say it.

That's what happens sometimes when it comes to writing, especially when it comes to blogging. For the last four days, I had this great idea for my next post. It was gnawing at me to get it down and out there. Today, when I finally have the time to write it, I can't remember what it was that I wanted to write!

So, sorry folks. You're stuck reading about how irksome it is for me to grow old. Er. Old-er. Older.

Oh, I almost forgot. I chose an eye chart today because I remembered having my eyes examined for new glasses one year. The doc told me that in Florida, if you can identify a two foot high letter "E" from 7 feet away, you see well enough to drive there. Remind me when I forget not to drive in Florida, ok?


  1. Aging... is hard. It takes a tough person to make it through to old age.

    I find that the older I become the more I let myself say and do things that were previously verboten. By the time I'm 80 nobody will be able to stand being around me! LOL!

  2. I very well could be reaching that threshold already, Pam!