Grass is Greener on the Other Side

I don't know if you've noticed, but lately, things have been catching me blindsided. It's a recent trend, and it seems that it isn't just a few things. It just might be becoming a way of life! Oh, how I wish I had health insurance...

I was just dropping into a deep sleep last night when I hear this knock-knock-knock. I live out in the middle of nowhere, just about, so I figured it was one of the dogs itching with a back leg and whacking the floor in the process.

Knock-knock-knock, rap, rap. "Jake, quit!" I snarled at the dog I figured was making all the noise.

Knock-knock-knock, rap, rap, rap rap rap. Now, I'm starting to get pissed, which means I'm waking up, and if it doesn't stop, I'll be completely awake and sleep won't come back for awhile.

Knock-knock-knock, rap, rap, rap, thump THUMP. That ain't no dog, but it's the middle of the night in the middle of nowhere, and who would be knocking? And, I'm awake. You see, the dogs only bark at other dogs, so there's none of that going on...until I get out of bed and head toward the front door.

"Theresa, sorry to wake you, but we were just going to bed when we heard the thunder of hooves go right by our bedroom window and we figured the only thundering hooves around here belonged to Odin, and sure enough, he's in our yard." My neighbor, Jason, who had no idea just how close he was to getting punched, said to me when I opened the door.

The front light has been out for weeks now. I have yet to remember to get bulbs at the store. So, I tromp off through the pasture blind as a bat and managed to step into all sorts of things I'm glad I didn't see in the dark, halter and rope in hand. Odin had his nose buried into the grass in their freshly-mowed yard and was no problem to catch. The trek back was longer, having to walk around the outside of the pasture to the front gate. If Odin was a few feet shorter, I would've jumped on and made him carry me back home. Instead he had to walk at a snail's pace, waiting for me to blindly feel my way home in the dark.

This morning, up before the sun, coffee in the making, I headed out with the fence charger that I hadn't yet had a chance to hook up. Odin ain't no dummy, and since he didn't get shocked the night before, he'll step on through the fence again unless I get it fixed up and zapping again.

I managed to get the charger hooked up quickly. The socket end of the electric cord had a sizable burn that about fused the old charger's plug to it permanently, and I was faced with a dilemma. No power, no electric fence, and no other power cord around. But, I tugged, and the two separated. Still, would there be juice coming through it? I plugged in the new charger, and nothing. Nothing I could do about it. I figured I'd run to Wally World after work and spend the day hoping that Odin stayed in the pasture all day.

By then, I had been kneeling so long on the ground that my legs didn't want to work. Uh oh. One leg was actually asleep. Double uh oh! So I wiggle around a bit, trying to get untangled enough to get a foot on the ground and looked around for something to grab onto to pull myself up with. The closest thing was the fence post at the beginning of the line, complete with the wire from the charger to the electric rope fence.

Oh well, the charger isn't working anyway, so I grabbed onto the t-post, and ZAP! Trust me, the "OW!" that came out of me echoed off the mountains a mile or two away. I hadn't actually touched the hot wire, but had put my finger close enough to it for the charge to ark, go through the end of my finger and to the metal t-post.

That's not the optimal way to start a day, especially without getting enough sleep, but Odin was still in the pasture when I got home from work. Whew! I was lucky this time, but I sure do hope that this strange trend of mine has an end to it!

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